How can exercise help with grief?
For those navigating the emotional landscape of bereavement, finding effective and compassionate ways to cope is essential. While there is no single solution to the pain of losing a loved one, research increasingly points to the restorative power of physical activity—not as a cure, but as a gentle companion on the path through grief.
Grief can manifest in various ways: sadness, anger, anxiety, and even feelings of numbness or isolation. These emotional responses are often accompanied by physical symptoms such as fatigue, disrupted sleep, and reduced motivation (Stroebe et al., 2007). While it may seem counterintuitive to suggest movement when energy is low, scientific studies have shown that exercise can play a significant role in counteracting some of these effects.
Physical activity has long been recognised for its impact on mental health. Regular exercise is associated with reductions in symptoms of depression and anxiety, as well as improvements in mood and overall psychological well-being (Sharma, Madaan & Petty, 2006). These benefits are particularly relevant for those experiencing grief, which can trigger or intensify mental health challenges. Even moderate, low-impact activities—such as walking, yoga, or gardening—can promote the release of endorphins and other neurotransmitters that help regulate mood.
Crucially, exercise does not need to be strenuous or competitive to be therapeutic. The focus is not on achieving fitness goals, but on nurturing the body and mind in a way that feels safe and supportive.
This week we sat with Michelle & Jean from Primrose Hospice who’ve kindly agreed to share how exercise helped them through their grief journeys.
Good morning both. Can you tell us a little about how you used exercise during your grief journey?
“Before Steve became poorly, I ran. I started in 2016 when our daughter went off to university. Ironically, to try and help me cope with such a change in the household dynamics. After Steve’s terminal diagnosis in 2020, I continued to run and found that it helped me cope with the situation. It meant I got out of the house; I got some exercise, I got some fresh air, and I met up with running friends who were all a great distraction. Steve was able to be left on his own at this point, so it wasn’t an issue”.
“It wasn’t easy at the start. My husband died during COVID, so I was isolated at the time but I joined the Queen Bees group because they had walking events happening every day. In the beginning though, I found I was dropping out at the last minute. But I had a fall shortly after my husband died that resulted in a back injury, which really made me realise how important it is to be fit, especially when on your own. So I joined the Queen Bees and met every Sunday for a walk. A big part of it is a social thing. We’d go for walks and then stop somewhere nice like the Queen’s Head on the canal or pop into Banners”.
“In 2021 I decided to sign up for the Virtual London Marathon which was on 3rd October. The challenge and training focused me and gave me something else to think about that wasn’t cancer or caring related. The training was gruelling but all I kept thinking was that Steve was having a much tougher time than me. I decided to raise money for the Brain Tumour Research charity, and I raised £2,770. This made all the effort worthwhile and helped raise awareness”.
“Agreed, doing it for charity makes it even more worthwhile. A friend asked if I’d like to join them dog walking and that turned into a regular thing for me. He has a strong fitness background so got me really into it and last year we ended up doing the North Worcestershire path, which runs from Shirley through to Bewdley over 3 days – 42 miles. I also did another walk last year to support Alzheimer’s with a friend over the Cotswolds. It was 13 miles in weather that no person would want to walk in, but yeah, crossing that finish line and thinking ‘you’ve done it’, is just a truly amazing feeling”.
“In Steve’s final year I didn’t run as I was caring for him. However, I knew that I needed to get back out there as soon as I possibly could. I began to run again in the January of 2023 and started from scratch with Couch to 5K again. I quickly found it helped my grieving. The running community are incredibly supportive and encouraging and before long I was signed up to run another Half Marathon, which I did for Primrose. I ran the Royal Parks half in October 2023 and raised £3,388. Having this challenge and focus to raise money for the charity that had helped my husband, myself and our daughter, really made me keep going”.
Amazing! In what ways would you say exercise helped you?
“Running has helped no end with coping with my grief both emotionally and mentally. In fact, the exercise element has now very much become an added bonus. I need to go out to run to clear my mind. Sometimes I chat with fellow runners about how I’m feeling, and they kindly listen. Other times I listen to fellow runners unload their worries and troubles. I think the fact that you run side by side and do not make eye contact allows you to open up, the same as on a walk or on a car ride. The best conversations I have with my children are on a long car journey. Other times I run with my music playing and enjoy the moment to switch off and allow the outside distractions to stop my mind from whirling.
The exercise makes you feel physically tired. Grief makes you feel mentally drained but not always enough to sleep well. The physical fatigue really helped my body to sleep which in turn rests the mind from all the emotional turmoil”.
“My family first thought I was bonkers but it’s created a lot of holidays for me. In the past year I’ve been walking all over the Isles of Scilly, St. Martin’s, Tresca and Guernsey. And a few months ago, I was walking over the Yorkshire Dales and up the Pennines just with my dog – Molly. On all of my trips I’ve met interesting and helpful people. Taking my dog can sometimes be difficult with using the rest room but I’ve always met someone willing to hold onto Molly. I’ve also recently been to Wales with friends where we were able to do some proper hiking, rucksacks and all. Next I’m planning a trip to the Amalfi Coast which I’m really looking forward to”.
Do you think there are benefits of spending time outside to help with grief?
“I do. You take in different sounds, smells, views, distractions, weather, and terrain. A walk always helps my mind reset, a run helps me stop thinking about things that are troubling me or at least calms me down enough to think straight and problem solve or find some solace. It stops my mind racing and gives me the chance to calm my mind. I have a small dog who I need to walk so she is always a good reason to get outside regardless of the weather”.
What might you say to someone who is struggling with things, would you encourage exercise?
“Absolutely! I met a lady on a walk not so long ago who had lost her husband recently. She said she didn’t feel right out walking, that it was too soon. I can understand that, working and volunteering at Primrose has taught me that everyone is different. So that’s what I said and that if there’s something else that suits, maybe try that. Then, while on a walk one day, we came by a dance fitness class that took her interest and she signed herself up the next day, which she’s really happy with. I’m proud to have been a part of that”.
“That they must give it a try. Just a walk, or a potter about the garden. Go for a walk with a friend and end at a café so you can have a lovely cup of tea or coffee and a refuel. Try Couch to 5K if running is something you’d like to do. There might be local courses happening near you or just download the app and try it on your own. You could always give Park Run a try on a Saturday morning. Park Walk is also now a thing so you don’t have to run the 5k you can walk it. Volunteering at these events is also so good for you personally and helps others. The park run community is friendly and encouraging and you’ll meet lots of people who are all battling their own journeys”.
Looking back, do you think it would have been different for you if you hadn’t started exercising?
“I think so. Coming to Primrose allowed me to get out and try new things. Thinking back, I would never had done the things I’ve been able to do recently; holidays, walks, golf… I’d never played golf before but just thought, “let’s see if I can hit a ball”, now I’m completely obsessed. Before I’d have just been going to the same old places, but now I’ve begun to explore”.
“I can’t imagine how different it would have been without exercise. I think I would have really struggled. Focusing on challenges and races kept my running going and I don’t think I would have coped very well at all. I have signed up for races in the next 12 months, including another marathon, 5 years since my first. This will keep me motivated and focused. I may not be a fast runner, but it doesn’t really matter, being outside and exercising has been the key”.
Thank you both, there’s a lot of valuable insight here and we appreciate you taking the time to share.
Exercise is a power tool but even so, sometimes we need an extra helping hand. If you or someone you know is affected by life-limiting illness or bereavement and seeking support, head over to our referrals page to learn about how Primrose Hospice & Family Support Centre can help.
Written by Josh Davies
References
Sharma, A., Madaan, V. & Petty, F.D. (2006) Exercise for mental health. Primary Care Companion to the Journal of Clinical Psychiatry, 8(2).
Stroebe, M., Schut, H. & Stroebe, W. (2007) Health outcomes of bereavement. Lancet, 370(9603).
Unless otherwise stated, Primrose Hospice is neither affiliated with, nor responsible for, any content on external links.
